January 18, 2008

Step 2 - Accept myself

Over the next few months, I'll be basing my articles on this "12 Steps to Happiness" post.

This step has always been a little tricky for me, because although I see all sorts of shades of gray everywhere, at first glance I'm more comfortable if I can categorise into either black or white. In this case, I need to find the fine line between feeling good in my skin and still being open for improvement and learning that works for me.

I guess for many women (and an increasing number of men), accepting our body is the one thing we can't seem to achieve whole-heartedly. We accept our parents, our friends, our spouses, our children, even our children's teachers the way they are - amidst the occasional grumbling, granted - but generally we don't try to change them. We love the people close to us for who they are, not for what they look like. In a society with a multi-billion dollar weight-loss and plastic surgery industry, I can't help but wonder - when are we going to love ourselves for who we are?

In my ideal world, I think one possible solution to the never-ending new year's resolution of dropping x-amount of pounds is this: educate yourself. Raise your children in a way that allows them to build a healthy self-esteem, and teach them about the marvel that is the human body. I find it hard to believe anybody would fill their temples with the malnutrition that is fast- and processed food on a regular basis if they were aware of what it's doing to their arteries and inner organs in the long run, never mind cellulite. While I'm dreaming, here's to hoping our governments will find a way to subsidise organic fruit, whole grain and vegetable farms instead of the sugary and fatty foods producers they favour now. This would make finding unhealthy foods that much harder (I know) but also drastically reduce temptation. Imagine watching a TV movie without constant interruptions of fast-food advertisements? Bliss! Ok, that's probably another handful of decades away, but nobody thought it would happen for cigarettes either, did they, and numbers for obesity-related deaths can't be that far behind its nicotine counterpart.

What's the worst, then, that could happen if I truly accept and start loving myself? In a way, the sentence can be misunderstood as "I'm great, there's no need to change." That is not my intention here. There will always be victories to celebrate, and there'll always be room for improvement. Accepting myself means "I accept that I am not perfect, and I don't have to be." I have character flaws and feel insecure about the size of my behind, and that's ok. I recognise the paradox between needing to accept my human form and yet continuously striving for betterment, and that's ok, too.

Consequently, the best things about accepting myself are feeling adequate in every situation, not comparing myself to others but creating my own standards; knowing and respecting my limitations, and treating myself with the same love and consideration I have for my best friend.

Til next time!

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